He Didn't Notice
by Discovering The Universe
Summary: One shot. Mabel and Dipper grew apart in high school, and Dipper reflects on his negligence to her pain. TW: Implied self harm, Implied eating disorder, Implied rape. Things got pretty sad.


**Please review and let me know what you think! I always take constructive criticism.**

It's funny how we don't notice things that are right in front of us.

He didn't noticed freshman year that he was leaving her behind. He had met some kids like him and things just sort of snapped into place. He finally fit in, people wanted to be around him, and he was almost... _popular._

He didn't notice that that wasn't the case for his sister. That instead of her fitting right in like she usually did, people were just downright... cruel. Calling her names, shoving her into lockers, teasing her mercilessly. She wore that brave smile all year, and Dipper was never around her for long enough to realize that there were cracks below the surface.

He didn't notice sophomore year how lonely she was. It had become apparent to him by then that she was an outcast. He didn't mean to, but he started distancing himself from her even more than he already was. People would give him surprised looks and " _She's your twin?! I bet you're glad you guys are nothing alike."_ And normally he would stick up for her. _God, why didn't he stick up for her?_ But he was just so glad that he finally had friends who thought he was cool that he just forced a laugh every time.

That was the year that people began to take jabs at her weight, too. It wasn't true of course, Dipper remembered clearly that she had been perfectly healthy, but they knew that it struck a chord with her, so they kept at it. He remembered being angry when he heard the girls in the hallway calling her 'Meaty Mabel', but still he said nothing, too afraid of jeopardizing his social status.

And when he heard her throwing up in their shared bathroom, and he asked her if she was okay, and she told him that it was just a stomach bug, he didn't notice that she was lying. And he never asked again, even though he could hear her in there almost every day.

He didn't notice how she became thinner and thinner, because honestly at that point he was so busy with school and all his friends and he even had a _girlfriend_ now, so he never really had time to look at her.

He didn't notice that summer how she always wore long sleeves.

And he had forgotten what her smile looked like.

Dipper threw a big party at the end of that summer to celebrate how they were going to be upperclassmen now, and he told her that she should come downstairs and join. She did. He got pretty smashed that night, just like pretty much everyone at the party. So in his drunken stupor, when he saw his best friend pressed up against her, his hands in places they didn't belong, he got pretty angry. But not for the right reasons. _I invite her and she hooks up with my friends?_ he had thought. _Not cool._ He didn't remember much of what he said to her, but one word still rang out in his head. " _Slut."_

He hadn't realized that she was trembling, or that she looked so numb with shock. But that one word was all it took, because then she had that reputation.

He didn't notice how people seemed to have even less respect for her after that. Boys would grab her in the hallways. Girls became even more vicious and merciless with their taunting. Dipper could hear her in the room next to his each night, crying herself to sleep. He never went in to check on her the way he would have when they were close. He was too busy being embarrassed of her.

He was sitting at the kitchen table late one night doing his homework when she stumbled inside. She was supposed to have been home hours ago, not that he or his parents had really payed attention. He didn't even really look up when she walked in. He didn't notice that she was holding together her torn shirt, or that she was bruised, or that she was sharking. He didn't notice the absolutely violated look on her face or the way she stopped, debating wether or not he was trustworthy enough to tell what had happened because _she needed help._ But obviously she didn't want to tell him, not after what he had said to her at the party. She didn't want to tell him because maybe he had been right.

He didn't notice until he found her curled up on the bathroom floor a few months later, about to end her life.

He found his old self right then, and remembered how protective of her he used to be, and Dipper wondered when he had lost that. He wondered when he had stopped looking out for her.

And he hoped that her old self was still in there somewhere too. He remembered how she used to laugh and smile and make conversation with anyone. He remembered how she used to be so creative and full of love for the world. The world who in turn had crushed her.

There were a lot of things he didn't notice, but he really wished he had, because as he held his sobbing, broken twin, he wasn't sure if he'd be able to put the pieces back together.


End file.
